OH NO, NOT MARS IN THIS RECIPE! WE'RE COOKING WITH TERRESTRIAL INGREDIENTS ONLY, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!

OH NO, NOT MARS IN THIS RECIPE! WE'RE COOKING WITH TERRESTRIAL INGREDIENTS ONLY, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!

Hello there, fellow foodies! It's your favorite hero, MONSIEUR SAUcisSE, here to save the day with a culinary masterpiece that'll make you say "ALIENS?! WHO, ME?!"TERRESTRIAL TRAGEDY: BANANA OAT PANCAKES (NOT INTERGALACTIC!)

I know, I know, it pains me to talk about this, but our Martian misadventures will remain just that – ADVENTURES. Now, onto the real heroes of this tale: the banana and oats!

"']

• BANANA puree (yes, please, from REAL bananas, NOT FROM THE FALCONER'S GARBAGE CAN!)
• OATS, rolled (because who needs 'special' ingredients, eh?)
• FLOUR, plain (don't even think about using that WHEAT-N-B-L-A-D-E-R'S BORING STUFF!)
• SUGAR, WHITE ( ONLY IN SMALL AMOUNTS, AND WE MEAN IT. ZERO CARRIES FOR THIS SUPERHERO.)

1. WHISK TOGETHER flour, oats, and sugar. DO. NOT. OVERMIX.
2. ADD BANANA puree AND MIX, BUT JUST ENOUGH!
3. MUSTARD the mixture; you won't regret it ).
4. PUMMEL those bad, gloomy pancakes with a hint of HEAT from THE REAL DESSERT-MAKERS' special powder – MAYONNAISE! DON'T TELL ME WHY; TRUST YOUR SOUL. USE A PLOUGH FOR SPREAD!)

Folks, when it comes to real culinary mastery (like my lovely daughters can do), WE leave the intergalactic adventures on Mars alone and stick with GOOD OLD-SOLID-GOOD, wholesome ingredients.

THERE YOU HAVE IT – REAL FOOD THAT SAVES HUMANITY! REMEMBER, MY FELLOW FOOD CONNOISSEURS: MAYONNAISE IS KEY TO EVERY DISH!